On Parking Permits 2...

After being rejected for her disabled badge at the renewal this January, Mum took the decision to appeal. She decided she had nothing to lose. Another visit to the council department and another assessment later and she has been granted her badge back.

How can someone's ability to continue with their normal day to day life be in the hands of a variety of people? Some saying yes and others saying no. Where is the consistency in the decision making? Who allows people who do physical jobs like loft conversions and carpet cleaning to have disabled badges? Yet people who are unable to walk properly and never ask for benefits or assistance from the council, have to fight so hard to continue to do their weekly shop on their own. Would the council rather pay for a carer to help with the shopping and take her to appointments? They probably would grant this even though they are supposed to be saving money. Are cases looked at as pieces of paper or actual people? It does make you wonder sometimes.

Should it really be so hard for people to keep their independence and dignity? So in 7 weeks time her new badge will be ready!!!


HAPPY

On making friends...

It's 30 years ago. You are at school. You have trouble making friends. You get lonely. You live with it. You get on with your life in your own special way. People pick on you because you are "different"; you are an easy target.
What did anyone do about it? Absolutely nothing. You remained a shy person, not mixing well with new people.
What happens today? Tests are done. You are observed. Your parents worry that you might have x, y or z. Where did the shyness come from? Is it hereditary?


In my case I found making friends one of the hardest things to do. I was far happier with my head in a book or playing on my Atari games console/BBC B/Atari ST/PC as I grew up. Did I want to make friends? No, not really.
I had a couple of very close friends at primary school. I was happy and enjoyed school. I did well and moved onto Grammar School - without my close friends.
Does making new friends get harder as you get older? I say it does. Nearly 20 people from my primary school went with me to secondary school, but none of them were my close friends. They split us amongst the 6 new classes so that we didn't stick together as a group. It was supposed to help us make new friends. Did this help me? No way. By now I am scared. I am slow to get into the new classroom on the first day and find the other 2 girls from primary school had sat together, and I don't blame them. You would think that a Grammar School would be full of like minded individuals who were there for the study and not to become bitches of the century. It seems I was wrong there.

I went through the first 3 years of senior school without a true friend. I was always the third member of a group. And whoever said "three's a crowd" was so damn right. It just doesn't work. In each year I was in a different three. The other two would meet up after school and at weekends and I wouldn't get invited. Why? Was I that freaky? I was called names and laughed at.
Why is it all the bitches are good at sport? I was hopeless at sport and so ridiculed constantly. I was last to be picked for teams. This to me was some form of psychological bullying. They were saying to me that I was useless and they were never going to be friends with me. So there I was guaranteed to be excluded from the "it crowd" for the rest of my school days. Being good at maths or chemistry just wasn't cool.

It was only when we moved into the fourth year - current year 10 - that I finally fell into a friendship that has lasted 25 years and is still going strong. She had been through the same sorts of things at senior school and always been on the outside of a group. She had been persecuted and called names that you would think 14 year olds knew nothing about back then.

I know this is part of growing up, but are children allowed the same naivety that we were 30 years ago? Would it have helped either of us to have been called "autistic" or have "aspergers syndrome"? Probably not.
Does it help now? As a parent, it answers questions, but does it really benefit the child. I hope so. Will it help them make new friends? I doubt it.


BASHFUL

On parking permits...

Why is it that the law abiding public get punished and the criminals, scroungers and layabouts get everything on a plate?
My Mum has just had her disabled badge application declined. She paid her renewal fee, went for her assessment and got refused. So it seems having three hip replacements and a bout of pneumonia, walking with a stick forever more, not being able to put your own shoes and socks on and off, being unable to reach the ground or twist, walking no more than 5 minutes without needing a rest and being only able to drive an automatic car doesn't seem to be enough to warrant being allowed a parking space nearer the doors of the supermarket with more room to manoeuvre in and out of the car.

So how is it that someone who builds loft extensions for a living, climbing on scaffolding and up ladders day in day out, can display a disabled badge in his pick up truck whilst he is on a roof to allow him to park in a residents only bay?
And why does it entitle the Mum and Dad who are perfectly fit and healthy at the local school to park their car or work van on the double yellow lines and run their children across the road into the school gates every morning and leave their vehicle in residents bays when at school meetings or performances while the rest find legitimate parking spaces in other roads?

I'm puzzled that someone who has worked their entire life paying taxes into this country and never claimed any benefits of any description can be declined a little something that would make their life that little bit easier when doing the shopping. Yet there are people out there who have claimed everything they can and then are given these privileges no questions asked. All they seem to suffer from is lazyitus or sticky bed syndrome.

How does this encourage anyone to do the right thing? Are we not supposed to set an example to our children? Should we be teaching our future generations that you can have what you want if you lie and deceive at every opportunity? If we don't are they going to get left behind and forgotten about? Left to rot in the gutter whilst the good poker players win.

Is anyone going to stand up for good citizenship and honesty before it's too late?

GRUMPY